Giving Back

I'm not really into Christmas gifts. This drives my mother crazy every year because we have the same conversation:

Mom: "What do you want for Christmas, Colleen?"
Me: "Uh, I don't know, nothing."
Mom: "Oh don't give me that, what do you want?"
Me: " I don't know. I really haven't given it much thought."
Mom: "Okay, well just tell me when you know."

Then we have the same conversation every week for the whole month of December until the 24th.

Besides the fact that I could actually use a really good camera, there is nothing I want and even the camera isn't anything I need. I kinda want to buy my family members each a goat for Christmas for a Christian organization in Africa, but I don't know how well that would go over with them.

Example fantasy:

Me to my brother: "Wow Ryan, this cashmere sweater from J.Crew is so beautiful, thanks."

"Oh, and here is your gift." (I hand him a picture of a goat.)
Ryan looks quizzically at the photo. "I don't get it."
"Well, I got you a goat for Christmas. I had it sent in your name to feed a child in Uganda and help his family with an income."
Ryan: looks at the cashmere sweater and then at the photo of the goat. "Oh, thanks."

See, I'd still feel like a jerk for not giving him, or any member of my family something tangible. The only reason why I feel like my gifts should be tangible is because everyone makes you think it should be. But half the stuff we give is just stuff anyway. You know? Besides, due to extenuating circumstances that are not in my control I can't really afford to spend lots of cash on presents.

I don't have an answer to any of this, but I found this video awhile back and I guess it explains my heart on the matter a little bit better.

Matthew 10:42
42And if anyone gives even a cup of cold water to one of these little ones because he is my disciple, I tell you the truth, he will certainly not lose his reward."